


will you know me?

by stormss



Category: 9-1-1: Lone Star (TV 2020)
Genre: Declarations Of Love, Established Relationship, Falling In Love, Fluff, M/M, Prompt Fill, Tenderness, this is....just fluff and carlos being lovestruck and more fluff
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-05-15
Updated: 2020-05-15
Packaged: 2021-03-02 21:14:57
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,352
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24193420
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/stormss/pseuds/stormss
Summary: Carlos knows he loves fully and deeply and quickly, and from what he’s gotten to learn about TK, his boyfriend wears his heart on his sleeve and sometimes looks at him as if he can see right down to Carlos’ core.It’s too much; it’s something he’ll be chasing after as long as he lives.*Or, Carlos tells TK he loves him.
Relationships: Carlos Reyes/TK Strand
Comments: 21
Kudos: 275
Collections: 9-1-1 Lone Star ▶ Carlos Reyes / Tyler Kennedy "TK" Strand





	will you know me?

**Author's Note:**

> prompt fill!!! [theworld-is-out-there](https://theworld-is-out-there.tumblr.com/) suggested: _TK to Carlos, "maybe I feel the same way."_ in turn this basically inspired me to write nothing but 2.3k words of fluff and carlos trying to figure out how to tell tk he loves him, and even more fluff — so i hope you enjoy!! 
> 
> the title comes from _georgia_ by phoebe bridgers. as always, come say hi and/or send me prompts over on my tumblr, [@reyesstrand!](https://reyesstrand.tumblr.com/)

Sometimes, Carlos thinks about just spitting out the words. 

But it’s a lot like exposing yourself, this vulnerability that comes with telling someone  _ I love you.  _ He doesn’t know how to feel about cracking himself open for the world to see, for _TK_ to see, and it makes him frustrated because sometimes he wants to yell from the rooftops that he loves TK, that he’s  _ in love  _ with TK, a man he’s dated for barely three months, officially. He wants to be open and carefree and not recoil at the thought of the pain he would feel if TK doesn’t feel the same way. 

(Not that he wants to hinge his emotions on another person’s feelings. And it’s not like he’d drop TK on the spot for not saying it back, because he knows how hard it is for him to let his walls fall down after the way his heart was thrown through the wringer a year ago. But it doesn’t mean it wouldn’t hurt). 

He tells himself that it’s a new discovery, this love he feels for TK that’s bigger than anything else he’s ever felt, and that he hasn't known ever since the pieces seemed to just fall into place when they started to get to know each other. He loves his family, would put himself in the line of any form of danger for his mom and sisters, but it’s  _ different  _ with TK. Carlos tries to wrap his head around how dizzy he makes him feel, in the best way possible, but also keeps him grounded and secure in ways he doesn’t have the words to describe. There’s a constant pleasant hum under his skin, practically radiating within him whenever he’s in a general proximity to TK, urging him to move closer and soak it all in. 

The last thing he wants is to move too fast, though. So he holds it in, and tries to figure out the right time to let his heart crack open. 

* * *

He doesn’t mean to fall so hard, so fast. 

TK has this thing about him, though, something that makes Carlos ache to be with him. 

Things aren’t automatically better after their night under the stars during the solar storm, but the good definitely outweighs the bad as TK heals and they start talking, like adults; they start-over, basically, leaving them both restless and eager like teenagers on their first date. Carlos was sure that the feeling blooming in his chest would reside, that it would eventually tamper down like distinguished flames, but they keep seeing each other on shift and they keep hanging out with the team afterwards, welcoming the well-meaning and good-natured teasing from TK’s crew. They talk all the time, even when their schedules don’t align, and they just seem to  _ fit.  _ Carlos won’t let them go past making out until TK’s fully healed, and they’re moving  _ slow,  _ and doing things properly — only TK practically jumps him the day he gets the all clear from his doctor. And it continues to surprise Carlos just how good the sex is. They don’t stray away from it now, seemingly too wrapped up in one another to go without it. 

It doesn’t mean everything to him, but the fact that they’re so compatible, so set on taking care of each other, on making sure to touch each other gently and with all the tenderness they can muster... _ that  _ means something. 

“You’re staring,” TK teases, pulling him from his thoughts. Carlos blinks and his gaze sharpens, realizing that he  _ has _ been focusing most of his attention on his half-naked boyfriend as he roams around the bedroom, pants still unbuttoned as he pulls his shirt on. 

He could try to write it off, still too caught up in how it was before they made this thing between them official. But he takes in the heaviness of TK’s gaze on him, feeling like he’s burning holes through his skin even from across the room. So Carlos pushes himself up on his elbows, and slowly drags his eyes up to meet TK's. “Do you blame me?”

TK rolls his eyes at him, though Carlos definitely clocks the smile he tries to bite back as fastens his watch and pats down his pockets for the usual: phone, keys, wallet. 

“You know, I’m really starting to think that the universe doesn’t want us to have the same days off,” Carlos says casually, watching as TK crouches down to grab his shoes. 

It’s not ideal, their current situation; Carlos usually gets off before midnight, and TK will come over to his place and crash with him until he has to get ready to start his next round of twenty-four hour shifts, usually needing to leave before ten in the morning. But it’s what it takes for them to actually  _ see  _ each other, when they can be alone and not interacting how they do when responding to a call, which is typically how they see each other most of the time. 

“I know,” TK sighs, standing straight before coming to drop one knee on the bed next to Carlos, leaning his weight against it. “It’s shitty. But hey, at least we get date night on Friday.” 

TK leans into his space and Carlos doesn’t get a chance to make some retort, or worse, some sort of declaration laced in a comment about how much he can’t wait for the date, or how he’ll miss TK while they’re apart for the next day. He does feel those things, but saying it just feels like he’s revealing too much. Especially now that TK’s kissing him, so much gentler and sweeter than those first couple of times where  _ forgetting  _ and _feeling something_ was on his mind. Carlos touches TK’s face, inches his hand back until he can cradle the back of his head, and TK leans more into the touch. 

“Shit,” TK murmurs, mostly against Carlos’ lips, “You make me not want to go to work.” 

Carlos opens his eyes and sees the flash of something in TK’s eyes when he says the words, his own heart lurching in his chest as TK presses his lips together before smiling a little at him. 

“Go on and save people,” Carlos whispers, ducking forward to steal one more kiss from his boyfriend. “While I go and try to save my mama’s vegetable gardens.” 

“I don’t think you know how much it  _ hurts  _ me that I don’t get to see that,” TK grins, pulling away reluctantly as he finally reaches down to button up his shirt. As he starts for the hallway, he lingers in the doorway, fingers curled around the doorframe as he looks back at Carlos. “I’ll text you.” 

“Be safe,” Carlos replies, their usual goodbye-combo, while thinking  _ I love you.  _ TK nods at him and smiles and heads out for work, while Carlos flops back against his pillows and sighs. 

* * *

It surprises Michelle, that they’ve had the “boyfriend” talk before the “I-think-I’m-in-love-with-you” talk. But Carlos shrugs it off, knowing that both he and TK craved something stable, which was more pressing than saying those three fateful words. But now he can’t stop thinking about it; how the declaration always seems to be sitting right on his tongue, begging to be said out loud. 

“You should just tell him,” Michelle says, shrugging so their shoulders bump as they walk side-by-side, retreating from their favourite food truck. 

“It’s not that easy, Michelle,” Carlos drops down across from her at their usual picnic table. He immediately starts fiddling with the wax paper that lines the basket their lunch is in. 

“Why not?” Michelle immediately digs into their order of chips to share, pulling the guac closer. “You know, I’ve been around him when you aren’t there, Carlos. The kid loves you, it rolls off of him. Just take the leap and tell him. When it feels right, of course.” 

The topic changes after that, Michelle talking about the plan she and her mom made to visit Iris the coming weekend, and how he’s always invited to join them. He nods along and he insists he does want to see her, when they think she’s ready. But it hangs over him for most of the day —  _ just take the leap and tell him.  _

And the way his heart keeps doing somersaults in his chest, he thinks he just might have to. 

* * *

It almost spills out of him, all the time. During a hectic call where things almost go south for one or both of them; when TK laughs hard enough he doubles-over, knocking into Carlos; when they’re doing nothing but basking in one another’s company, thumbs dragging over knuckles and mouths pressing against pulse points; when TK’s breath seems to rush out of him all at once in a huff, chest pink and his mouth chasing his when they’re in bed; when TK just  _ grins  _ at him when they’re all together in a group, focusing his eyes on him, keeping him in the loop. 

There are so many moments condensed in such a small amount of time. Carlos knows he loves fully and deeply and quickly, and from what he’s gotten to learn about TK, his boyfriend wears his heart on his sleeve and sometimes looks at him as if he can see right down to Carlos’ core. 

It’s too much; it’s something he’ll be chasing after as long as he lives. 

* * *

“Well, this is nice,” TK says, looking around as he stands a few steps ahead of Carlos, taking in his dining room and the way he’s dressed it up for their date — flowers on the table, candles strewn around the glass surface, nice plates and silverware because his mom always told him that made a difference. He knows TK would’ve been down for take-out and a movie, but Carlos wants this to be a night worth remembering. 

“I wanted to do something nice,” Carlos explains, stepping up behind TK and dropping his hands onto his shoulders, slowly running his palms down to his elbows and then back up, feeling some of the residual tension from his shift fading under his touch. “Are you hungry?” 

“Do you even have to ask?” TK smiles as Carlos takes his hand, threading their fingers together as they stroll up to the table. Before they sit, though, TK turns to face him. “Wait.” 

Carlos cocks his head in confusion, wondering if something’s wrong, when TK just smirks and cups his face in his hands and kisses him. It immediately levels out his breathing and makes a feeling of calm wash over him, as TK presses forward on the balls of his feet to make up for their minuscule height difference and keeps their bodies flush as he deepens the kiss. 

It almost knocks him off his feet, how much he loves this. 

“You seem nervous,” TK whispers, smoothing a thumb over Carlos’ jaw, instantly relaxing the tension building there. “It’s just me, you know.” 

“I know, I’m sorry,” Carlos mutters, still distracted by what he’s planned to say to TK. His boyfriend makes a face he can’t really read, but they still sit across from each other and dig into the meal that Carlos has made and afterwards they leave the dishes to soak and Carlos tells TK he has a surprise for him; they get into the Camaro and they drive and drive, until they end up at the same grassy, expansive and empty field where they decided to try this, for real, under the green and purple lights in the sky.

“Hey,” TK says, after a few long moments of them sitting on the hood of the car, mirroring that night almost exactly. Carlos tilts his head to look at his boyfriend, who’s already looking at him. “Is everything okay? I mean, you seem...weird.” 

“Weird?” Carlos repeats, knowing his confusion is laced in his voice. 

TK bites on the inside of his cheek, waving around his hand in a vague gesture, trying to make his point. “Well, you were really quiet during dinner and you just seem frustrated about something.” 

“I just—” Carlos stops, shaking his head at himself. 

“You can talk to me,” TK says, reaching over to take Carlos’ hand. He latches onto that point of contact like a lifeline. “You always can.” 

“I guess I _am_ frustrated,” Carlos starts, and when TK tenses next to him, he quickly adds: “With myself. I swear.” 

TK nods, still looking apprehensive, and Carlos takes a deep breath before continuing, trying to smooth over the antsy energy he's created. 

“I’m frustrated because I want to tell you—tell you about how I feel,” Carlos quietly admits, sparing a glance over at his boyfriend, only to watch the words sink in and draw a small smile out of the other man. “And I don’t want to make you feel like we’re moving too fast, or scare you off, or—”

“Carlos,” TK saying his name is enough for him to be pulled from his thoughts, and TK’s green eyes are steady and clear and  _ fond  _ as they settle on him. “You should tell me.” 

“But—” 

TK squeezes his hand. “You never know, maybe I feel the same way.” 

And there’s so much  _ knowing _ in his voice that it leaves Carlos just a little breathless. And ready to bare his soul. 

“Well, Ty,” Carlos whispers, “I love you.” 

He barely gets the words out because TK’s grinning and pulling him close, declaring “I love you, too,” right into the kiss. 

And it feels like a revelation, as they kiss openly under the stars, their hearts beating happily as one. Carlos presses a kiss to the corner of TK’s mouth, down his jaw, to the sensitive spot just below his ear. His whole body shakes with it, with the knowing, the openness, the vulnerability of being in love and having TK not only know it but share those same feelings that feel so strong it’s like they could knock down buildings. 

Later, he says it again,  _ I love you,  _ right into TK’s sternum — because he can. And he doesn’t plan on stopping. 

**Author's Note:**

> thank you for reading! let me know what you think!!


End file.
